A lot of parents prepare their children for a run at a college experience by putting them through a number of extracurricular activities. Other parents might make sure that their child is gaining skills that are necessary in the working world where they might end up after school. All of these are usually good, positive things that can help build a teen for long-term success. But if you really want to get down to it, there are several tools and attributes that children can use to masterfully adapt to life after school. These are all tools that you can teach at most any age as there are always “moments” you can turn into a lesson on most of these topics.
1 – Grit
Angela Lee Duckworth was teaching seventh grade math students when she noticed that IQ wasn’t always a predictor of success. Through her own experience and research, she identified grit as a key component that was present in those that succeeded more than those that didn’t. In simple terms, grit is simply the knowledge that you can keep pushing at something that is troublesome (or try again if you fail) and then putting real effort to the issue. You can watch her TED talk here.
2 – Growth Mindset
Carol Dweck’s book, “Mindset” is required reading for any parent. More than just being positive, growth mindset is a requirement for grit, but it also takes the practice one step further. Growth mindset states that you have limits, but you can break those limits – regardless of the task. A fixed mindset will force a child to think that if they fail at something, that’s as good as they will ever get at that activity. Children with growth mindset will look at their effort and say “I can do better” and will take another shot at it – showing the character of grit. But in that effort, the child also learns what is working and what isn’t – so it is not just a matter of completing an activity. The child is constantly improving and learning to improve which is an invaluable skill for anyone in any walk of life.
3 – Exposure to the “real world”
Transitioning from a school environment to a working environment is often like swimming in an indoor pool and then transitioning to the ocean. With some exceptions, children barely even get a chance to see this “real world”, let along interact with it. Give them an opportunity to see the world around them from a practical sense – either through an internship, part-time job, or through multiple shadow days. You can even do something as simple as taking them on a drive around town and looking at the businesses that populate your area. Ask them to really understand the “why” of a workspace and what is the purpose of the business or organization – what problems/issues that business solves. This gives your children at least a basic idea of how the world works when it comes to knowing where to go to get certain problems solved. It also indicates where they might want to work to be able to solve problems they find attractive.
4 – Self inventory of interests, abilities and audiences
Ok, I’m being biased here because The Dream Job Blueprint helps students identify these things pretty well though there are certainly other sources that help. However, the research around self-awareness is pretty overwhelming when it comes to how valuable it can be to any individual. The more a person knows themselves, the better they can function and adapt in the world around them and the more likely they can find their happiness in the world as opposed to finding disappointment through trial and error.
5 – Learning with purpose
When a baby plays with blocks, they tend to pick one up and then drop it looking at another. We can be the same way about education in terms of how we interact with our lessons. The War of 1812, the specific heat of water, impressionism, the Pythagorean Theorem, Freud – if we don’t see purpose in learning any of these things, we tend to forget them as soon as we can. However, if we have a goal in mind – like a dream career or desired vocation – then we can start to see context and purpose for learning. Every human endeavor has a connection to math, science, history, art, language and philosophy. By examining different industries and the educational requirements necessary to be successful in those industries, the student can then gain context and purpose in the information for long-term use and not simply forget it after taking the test.
Conclusion
Taken individually, these characteristics enable a student to (1) see how they fit into the “real world”, (2) discern where they can and want to be helpful, (3) continue to grow and problem solve as they meet adversity, (4) persevere adversity and keep going when they hit obstacles and (5) know themselves and their value to others which makes them valuable and versatile assets. But perhaps more importantly, taken together, these characteristics encourage growth from a child to an adult by fostering adult relationships, advanced skills and an eye always to the future. By giving them a firm foundation in these areas, you give your child the best chance to avoid a “failure to launch” event and find a life path they can use.
These are some of the best – there are in fact many more. What do you think are the best tools for children to have in order to transition to adults? Leave a comment below.
